My blog is called Image grenade, obviously  image is of utmost concern.

But one of the most important things that can affect your image has nothing to do with your personality, your sartorial sense or how your lovely countenance.

It’s your credit report.

By law, you are entitled each year, to one free credit report from each of the three credit reporting agencies, Experian, Equifax and TransUnion.

I recommend that you order them one at a time from each company. By requesting each report individually, you will have plenty of time to review each report carefully, make any changes or corrections and then a few months later check the next report for any inaccuracies.

I mention inaccuracies because on an Experian report, they cited a previous address, at which I’d never resided. That may not seem like much, but in an era of identity theft and credit fraud, someone could easily be masquerading as you to have a utility or cable installed, that may later appear as your debt.

So, go to   https://www.annualcreditreport.com get your first report and start checking.

Mistakes can be corrected, but only if you know they exist. Knowledge is power and

Knowing whose who’s been requesting information on you, may save you from a much larger identity fraud issue later on.

Recently a friend handed me a $75 gift certificate for Sephora. If there was just one beauty product I’d been lusting after, that amount would have disappeared instantly, but I didn’t know what I wanted so I decided to visit my local branch.

I’m not easily intimidated, but once through the doors, I stood in the middle of the store spinning around, viewing every make up house known to beautydom, contained under one roof and  felt a woosh of dizzying lightheadedness. There from every corner, carousels and wall displays with the names of iconic fragrances emblazoned on them sparkled at me. I thought I might actually pass out, right there in the middle of the shop. I may have, but I remembered that Sephora is a French chain whose policy is not to rush to your assistance, but to hang back, making themselves only available if and when you actually need help and I was pretty sure they’d seen the shock of virgin visitors before and wouldn’t see that as a reason to fetch a chair and a glass of water, so I pinned my knees tightly together until I regained my equilibrium. 

While I had a list of items I was interested in, I was just too overwhelmed by the choice, I had to beat a hasty retreat.

I did use the gift certificate, online. Even then it took three hours to review the lines, I like, the special gift sets, sale offerings and mini sizes before I made my final collections.

So while I applaude Sephora for having nearly everything, when you’re not quite sure what you want, everything can be a bit too much.

Sephora:

1714 Chestnut Stree

Philadelphia, PA 19103

Or www.sephora.com to order online or find a store near you.

When I was a kid, all you wanted was a Mum who soothed your boo boos, made cupcakes for the school bake sale and didn’t embarrass you on parent’s night.

A lot more is expected of the modern mother. She must be ultra organized, and either a full time Mum who runs the house with the efficiency of Martha Stewart or if she’s a working Mum, be a captain of industry who, when she isn’t working all the hours God sends,  showering her kids with gifts and or fabulous experiences (Do I see a Disney Princess Day in your future?) to ameliorate her guilt for working so much ,and not being able to stay at home like the aforementioned Martha clone.

The New Millennium Mummy  must also be yummy; and I don’t mean, there’s a bit of frosting on her from baking a coconut cake, just because it’s Tuesday; but along the lines of “Stacey’s Mom has got it goin’ on” MILF. Yup, no longer is it Madonna or whore, you need to be both. So  Mums have a lot  on their plate, but motherhood does not give carte blanche and right of way on every street, road, shop, restaurant or method of public transport. Recently I’ve been nearly mowed down by two  prams pushed  by over zealous  Mums  on the sidewalk.  I’ve also been sideswiped in cafes, had my toes run over on the bus and bashed in the back of the knees while shopping at Whole Foods.

And that was just the normal run of the mill carriage. For the fitness types, there is a pram created for runners that by sheer virtue of its size and nubby tires, virtually invites Mums to bulldoze unsuspecting pedestrians while shock absorbers assure your baby barely notices the crushing of bone beneath. 

Now that the weather’s getting warmer,  and more of you are enjoying “Baby’s day out” I’m begging you to leave a bit of distance, allow us a small bit of space to navigate around you, or at least scream at us so we can get out of the way before you sheer  off the back of our ankles with your front tires. While you may be proof it’s possible to have Elle McPherson’s body and a baby, does that give you the right to body slam those of us in your wake?

 I live in a city where I have to navigate, brick, cobblestone, uprooted tree stumps and small fluffy dogs, all while maintaining a quick step and all while trying to remain upright. And while I’m  a Power Walker, I’d have to be Usain Bolt to avoid you lot.

So c’mon ladies, have a heart. Surely you have at least one maternal bone in your body that might assuage you from crushing mine?

I detox quite regularly, mostly because I retox between Friday and Sunday. But with vacation looming, I need want to drop a few pounds and abstaining from calorie laden wine is advisable.So this is how I’ll be staying away from the wine, and encouraging my body’s return to ultimate health.Kale:Although long neglected, kale is one of the healthiest foods on the planet. Rich in vitamins A, C and K,  lutein, iron and fiber it’s the sulfur content in kale that makes this an incredibly valuable food. The sulforaphane released when Kale is chewed, triggers the release of an enzyme that detoxifies the liver of carcinogens and potential hazzards from alcohol consumption.Taking Milk thistle supplements:By ingesting 420 to 600 mgs of milk thistle extract daily, I can naturally assist my liver in cleansing itself.Drinking Ginger Tea:Ginger boosts circulation and the heat of it helps flush toxins out of the system so I’ll be simmering slices of ginger in water for 20 minutes and sipping throughout the day. I also slip ginger in a stir fry and  and when I steam veggies.Kudzu:Used in Traditional Chinese Medicine, Kudzu not only assist in relieving hangovers but can help reduce the desire to drink. Wo when meeting up with friends, I’ll take 500 mg before I head out.So with my detox plan in place, I should be healthier and thinner just in time for my June holiday in London. Once there,  I’ll be retoxing again at Searcy’s champagne bar in St. Pancras Station.

She’s beautiful, she’s famous and she has flown the flag for super success for  black women world wide, but Naomi Campbell must be stopped.I’m not a fan of the word bitch unless used in context, as in Being In Total Control, Honey. It’s used generally a label slapped upon  women who dare to stand up for themselves in an attempt by the old boys network, to put them in their place.A man who knows his own mind and refuses to lessen his expectations is “masterful”, “discerning”, “exacting”, while women get “bitch”.I don’t think Naomi Campbell is a bitch.I think Naomi Campbell is a woman in serious need of anger management….AGAIN.In the  latest outburst,  she punched a camera, after apparently feeling offended by a reporter questioning allegations that she had accepted a blood diamond from war criminal and former president of Liberia, Charles Taylor.Now if she didn’t like the question, she could decline to answer, which she did. She could have also made an early exit, which she also did. What’s not on sister,  is taking a swipe at a poor, defenseless camera.And what the hell does Naomi have against electronics anyway?In 1998 she attacked her then assistant with a telephone.In 2005 she allegedly beat another assistant with a Blackberry.In 2006, she allegedly attacked a housekeeper with a jewel encrusted mobile phone.I think the only surprise here was she chose to beat up a camera this time. Phones worldwide were cheering.And that doesn’t include the fisticuffs without that invention of Alexander Graham Bell.In 2006 she allegedly punched an Italian actress who had the temerity to wear the same dress as the diva. In 2008 she was arrested on suspicion of attacking a constable in Heathrow’s Terminal 5  after learning one of her bags had been lost. Sensibly, British Airways has now banned her from flying with them globally, after reports from several crew members that she exhibited threatening behavior, was disorderly and verbally abusive.In March 2010 a driver filed a report with the NYPD that Campbell had allegedly punched and beat him, before fleeing the scene.Of course like most of the rich and famous, she’ll pay a fine, have a spin doctor illustrate that it was the insensitivity of the reporter that baited Ms. Campbell. Who knows, the race card may be played. I imagine  something along the lines of, “it was incredibly hurtful that a woman of African descent could be accused of accepting a stone, whose mining and smuggling costs other African’s their lives and freedom. That’s what set her off you know.”I’d like to see jail time or at the very least those she claims as surrogate fathers, Quincey Jones and Nelson Mandella take her aside for a very stern chat. I’m not really sure that would help however. If at nearly 40 years sshe hasn’t learned how to manager her temper or how to treat people with respect maybe a chat from mentors isn’t needed.Maybe what she really needs is as a good beat down by someone stronger, with more money and better lawyers.

When Earth Day began in 1970, much of America saw it as a threat. A fete by the Hippy Dippy anti-establishment, who ate vegetables and hugged trees.

Since then, ecological issues like recycling, vegetarianism, and lowering our carbon footprint have gone mainstream.

Sure, we’ve come along way in the last 40 years, but don’t go thinking just because your local supermarket chain offers reusable carry bags, that we’re there yet. There is still much that could and needs to be done, even at the basic Reduce/Reuse/Recycle level.

For example, how any people insist on purchasing and carrying bottled water . By simply purchasing a stainless steel bottle and filling it from the tap we could save both the resources used to produce the bottles and free valuable landfill space. If that doesn’t grab you, how about the money you’ll save? And  while we  jokingly call it Schuylkill Punch,  Philadelphia is in the top 100 cities with the best tap water, coming in at #60.Buying green is easier too, but  you have to read labels to really suss out what is truly green and organic as opposed to items that are being green washed. Green washing is when the guy in the corner office realizes how much more money they could make by using generic terms like “Organic” or “earth friendly. Over the last few years there has been a move to certify organic to lessen some of the confusion, when it comes to terms like natural there is still quite a bit of wiggle room. For example Post select cereals were claiming to have natural ingredients” when, in fact, the corn used in the cereal was genetically modified.Clairol was advertising that its Herbal Essences line was “a truly an organic experience” when that wasn’t quite on the level. While they did use  some organic, ingredients, use a percentage of post consumer recycled plastics in the creation of its bottles and does not test on animals, the sodium lauryl sulfate, propylene glycol and D & C red No. 33 are chemicals.Poor Al Gore had to believe that “An Inconvenient Truth” would enlighten all of us about the plight of global warming, yet you need look no further than Google to see the number of politicians and religious leaders that poo poo the notion.All I’m saying, to quote Tesco “Every Little Helps!” It all ads up people so c’mon, don’t just recycle your papers, start flattening those cereal boxes too. Don’t toss old clothes and towels, use them for cleaning rags. There are small steps you can do everyday and if you’re not sure where to start I’ve got a primer reading list below.For some of you, becoming green may be something you do to preserve the earth for your kids.

Not having kids, it’s not my impetus. But since I’m being  cryogenically preserved, with a chance of returning to this mud ball someday, do it for ME!!

If they wake me from my ice nap and I find you’ve screwed it all up, none of you will rest in peace.

Big Green Purse: Use Your Spending Power to Create a Cleaner, Greener World by Diane MacEachern

Living Like Ed: A Guide to the Eco-Friendly Life by Ed Begley

1001 Easy Ways For Earth-Wise Living - Natural and Eco-Friendly Ideas That Can Make A Real Difference To Your Life ~ Reader’s Digest

To paraphrase  the Countess de Lave from the 1939 film The Women “Couture, couture. Toujours couture.”  Yes I’m a girl that loves clothes. A long skirt, shift dress, properly tailored trouser and a french cuff, never fail to thrill. But when was the last time I actually set foot in a atelier, boutique or even a local branch of Jones NY?

Let’s see, it’s April now?

Well not this year.

I know!! Shopping is girlie and I’m the girliest of girls but, at the risk of having my membership to the sisterhood revoked, I must confess;  I just HATE clothes shopping.

Oh I know I have issues with both body confidence and fashion acumen, but I wish it didn’t have to thwart my shopping efforts so.  Along with most of the hibernating population, I did pick up a few pounds over the winter, but maintaining my workout schedule did mean I managed to keep everything hard as a rock and cellulite free, despite not rocking sizes in the low single digits.

But because I’m so conscious of what looks best on my body shape (thanks Stacey and Clinton), it’s often hard to find what suits me in a length not too short and a pattern not to vile. Combine that with sartorial savvy that puts me three seasons ahead (or several decades behind) what the arbiters of fashion in NY decree is trend, well, you can begin to see my problem.

I have had some luck with ebay. I’m incredibly good at measuring myself, calculating the exact number of overage in inches I need in fabric not to hug anything too tightly and have even managed to make spring dress purchases in February that fit perfectly when debuted in May, but with a constant stream of the outdated and ill fitting going to Goodwill, I’m in real danger of wearing the same thing to the office all the time, and I work from home three days a week.

So as combat for a capsule wardrobe, desperation has even forced me to consider sewing again. Before you think my considerable talents lend themselves to channeling the late Alexander McQueen, I’m the one who failed sewing class twice having  abandoned completing a shirt with epaulettes, and a pair of culottes. As recently as three years ago, I did make a complete dress, all by my lonesome but since then my best handiwork were triple thick potholders I created with vintage fabric as Christmas presents.

So maybe I’ll take a sunny weekend to venture in and try on some garb from Zara, or Ann Taylor, or maybe I’ll grab a vintage pattern and take a crack at whipping up something myself.  If I do the latter, you’ll recognize me on the streets of Philadelphia. I’ll be wearing the triple thick padded dress with a hanging loop at the back.

I’d kill for a piece of this burg that ain’t crowded with freaks and Satanists, but say, hypothetically, I was walking around the city and found myself alone with only some squirrely lookin’ ape following me.

Sure I’ve got legs like a kangaroo, but that only works for kicking him in the nads once I’m down. And what if he knocks me down and I hit my head…..again. Face it, one more knock on the noggin and all of my misspent youth at the Kennel Club goes right out of the window.

So, how to I get the upper hand? How about catching him off guard with the amplified tones of a shrieking harpie. Well the Ila Dusk does just that. This cute little charm like bauble has a removable pin, (think hand grenade), that when pulled starts screaming in the event you’re not as loud as your truly, or suffer vocal chord constriction rendering you silent. Courtesy of this electronic gizmo, you’ve got a way to get attention that’s less likely to be ignored like a whistle or something that emulates a car alarm. Currently available at Marks and Spencers in the UK for £19, it’s scheduled to come to the US soon, so keep an eye, or an ear out.

For more information about the Ila Dusk visit their website www.ilasecurity.com or even better, watch some of the groovy YouTube virals about the product. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pakDKPDV3ew

So I started a blog because it was an easy way to keep a hand in writing. Then I was so busy with, well, with life in general, that I thought the pressure of keeping the blog up to date was simply another stressor I didn’t need, so I stopped. Then I came to my senses.I work from home three days a week  and the office two.

At home, I’ve only the cat and BBC Radio 4 for company. At work, it’s Radio 4, supplemented by the attendees of whatever Live Meeting I’ve been coerced in to attending. Neither provides me with much in the way of meaningful interaction so I decided it was time to take up the keyboard again and regale you all with my thoughts and often incongruous musings. I mean, if Giles Coran can do it, why can’t I, or do I need a literary pedigree and a column in The London Times to rant with glorious abandon.

And what’s the first message I have for all of your scrump doggies and hellcats upon my triumphant return? A bit of advice;  Stress less, or at least work on stress management.

Upon  arriving at a conference in Toronto, where all the materials I shipped didn’t have the good manners to do the same, I was completely stressed. I was nauseous, started retaining fluid at such an alarming rate, I began to resemble Violet Beauregard after consuming the three course gum in Willie Wonka, and my hair fell out in clumps.

For a short solution, I turned to Bach Rescue Remedy Pastilles. This new method of dispensing a tried and true favorite managed to keep me from having a breakdown. That was followed up by the company of a bottle of Malbec and a few hours of live jazz.

When I returned home, headed straight towww.thenaturalhealingspa.com. After a deep tissue massage and 30 minutes in a 130 degree infrared sauna, I feel worlds better, and less toxic (alas, not more hirsute). 

 So take, my advice, anything really worth having in life costs. You’re going to have to pay now or pay later and when it comes to your health and sanity, if I don’t make time  to address it now, it will wait for you . What could be ameliorated by regular massages, meditation and a heap of supplements and homeopathic cures, could quickly exacerbate into a need for human hair wigs, compression body stockings and a therapist’s questions posed through a speaker as I bounce off the walls in a rubber room.

Having said that, I’ll enjoy a lovely wheatgrass juice, while I compose on my laptop.